Table for One? Um, Ok.

Jennifer Lancaster
7 min readOct 15, 2020

As a life coach, one of the things that I often hear from women is that they don’t feel confident doing things alone. When you start to venture out of your comfort zone it can be a bit intimidating.

I want to share a personal story of what I learned the first time I got a table for one. But first…

One grating observation I have made after working 29 years in the Service Industry is this: Most often when a person walks into a restaurant and requests a table for one, the hostess insists on reiterating “Only one?” As if one isn’t enough; insinuating that one is frowned upon. Why is this?

Furthermore, staff always seems to make this person the center of conversation: “Ahhh, I feel bad for that lady that she’s sitting alone.” Why is it we feel uncomfortable? Is it because we personally aren’t okay with being alone? Let’s be honest, there are a myriad of reasons she could be eating alone (none of which are really our business, but let’s go there).

Maybe she chose to be alone.

Maybe she’s traveling and been in meetings all day and this is refreshing AF for her.

Maybe she just got out of a horrible relationship and she’s finally able to get some peace and quiet.

Maybe she’s in a great relationship and she and her husband have a really healthy understanding of making sure they each get “me” time and this is her night for that.

Why do we make assumptions as a society that being alone is unusual or wrong? My thought? Because we haven’t learned how to be with ourselves, that’s why. I don’t remember ever learning from my family or in school about how it’s important to learn to “be” with yourself. However, I have learned that it’s crucial to learn the value in doing things alone.

Yes, You Heard Me, Table for One

I was only twenty-three years old when I booked my first reservation. It was at an upscale French restaurant in New Orleans. Here’s the thing, if it were under different circumstances, I may have not followed through with it. But it was an unusual situation that forced me into it.

I was visiting a friend who was going to grad school at Tulane. We used to tend bar together. It was over Halloween…

Jennifer Lancaster

Soulpreneur Intuitive life coach, certified Angel card reader, traveler, foodie, house music lover, artist, lover of life. IG- @jenergy17